Un-Dieting
Eating is something we need to do to survive, quite literally. Yet it is one of the MOST controversial topics out there. What’s healthy? What’s unhealthy? Something as simple as nourishing our bodies with food becomes this huge conversation that leaks into our every day lives, conversations, and thoughts to the point of toxicity. A whopping 28.8 million Americans suffer from an Eating Disorder. Instead of changing our language around food, body types, education - there is this massive market out there pushing diet culture and promoting “health” in unrealistic ways while profiting off of those millions’ illness. Only getting richer as their customer gets sicker. Seems a little backwards, no? The process to “un-diet” is a long road for most and an even harder one for those with an ED. But the concept is very simple and one that I am actively teaching myself and hoping to spread to those around me, especially my daughter.
How we speak to ourselves about our bodies, whether in our head or out loud, can cause a ripple effect not only within our own minds, but to everyone around us. Kids especially get hit hard with this while growing up because they are literally looking to adults and their behaviors to learn how to become one. You can see how without having a hard look at yourself, the cycle just continues. The language is sooo subtle too. It’s something as simple as “I had a big lunch, so I’m only going to have a light salad for dinner.” or “Man. I wish I wouldn’t have eaten that,” while you stand in front the mirror poking and prodding at your body. These sentences seem so harmless and you’re probably sitting there thinking you have said these exact words before. Me too. But I just ask that you sit back and think about what you’re really saying. What a kid (or really anyone) hears is, oh, if I eat more than what is considered “normal” to most, I must punish myself by eating less at the next meal or even worse I just ate as much as they did, should I be hating myself too? Can you see how toxic this language is?? We need to love our bodies for everything they are and celebrate them! Don’t make a demon out of the one thing that we all need to survive because soon enough it can manifest itself into a silent battle for every little piece of food that you put in your mouth. Our bodies are forever changing. Some days, it needs more fuel than others. Some days, it wants nothing but sweets. Some days it wants nothing but vegetables. All are 100% completely and absolutely acceptable. We need to change our sentences to “I am really craving some veggies right now!” or even “man! I have been so hungry lately, my body must be getting stronger!”. I recently saw a short post from this mom that was out shopping with her young daughter who tried on pants that were a little too tight and her daughter’s response was “I think I need a bigger size, my legs are too powerful for these.” How amazing is that?? It’s so empowering in such a small little sentence from such a small little human! Never once did she think she had to have a salad at her next meal or that she needed to lose some weight to fit the constraints that society put on her body with a “size”. Rather than celebrating our bodies for being strong, powerful, bigger, or whatever it is - we somehow all accepted what society deems as “healthy” or “unhealthy” and somehow it is directly correlated to our size. WTF?
Let me go ahead and shatter the glass. There is no such thing as good or bad food. Food is literally food. It has different caloric and nutritional values that help in different situations that your body needs on different days and throughout the years. Of the 9% of Americans that suffer from an eating disorder - 7% of that is suggested to be suffering from orthorexia. Orthorexia is an eating disorder where you obsess over foods deeming them “healthy” or “unhealthy” based off of what society has said or maybe diets that you’ve tried. So much so, that people with this particular ED are barely eating anything at all and finding it hard to completely nourish their bodies. For instance, the idea that a donut is unhealthy and a salad is healthy. We all know that (some) salads are more nutrient dense than a donut, yes. But to say one is healthier than the other is so pointless and causes a spiral of guilt, self-hate speak, and eventually restriction. Whereas if we just saw a donut as quite literally a donut and then a salad as just a salad, we wouldn’t be concerned with which one we ate at all. Each food affects us all differently, at different stages of life, and in and out of each day. All I’m trying to prove is that food is food and comparing them is like comparing apples to oranges (literally haha!).
Instead, we should be eating intuitively. The idea of intuitive eating is to listen to your body and give it what it needs. If it’s craving a soda? Give it a soda. I promise it won’t be the end of the world. It’s actually been proven through many studies that those that diet or restrict their cravings and eating, come back completely bingeing on the food and gaining more weight than when they started the diet. Our bodies are not meant to be restricted nor controlled when it comes to food. If we were all to un-diet, just completely throw out everything we’ve heard, been told, seen about good food vs bad food, or the HORRIBLE “counting calories!” and just eat intuitively - you will notice that your body can actually regulate itself!! If you don’t restrict something from your brain, your brain no longer harps on it and no longer leads to completely bingeing on food that you told yourself you “can’t have”. It’s quite amazing to see. It’s been done with kids, where they put dessert on the plate every night along with their normal dinner food. And of course, the kids eat the dessert first and barely touch their vegetables the first few nights. But then - knowing that the dessert will be there no matter what - they realize that they don’t need to binge on that first and something amazing happens - they eat all their veggies and all their protein and half the time they don’t even eat the dessert. The dessert has now been normalized and put on the same level as the other food that it lost its specialty! It lost its “forbidden-ness”. Intuitive eating can also help with portion size and moderation. With intuitive eating, you are honoring your hunger. You’re listening to your body telling you that you’re hungry and paying close attention to when it tells you that it’s full.
Food is such a passion of mine in all its many facets. I could probably write a small novel on it, and basically just did haha! From how we nourish our bodies, to food accessibility, to cooking, to using food as a healing agent - I get very swept up in my personal experiences and the research I have done on it. I’m only covering one of the many faces of my love for food today because I felt as though it was the most relevant for me currently. I have a little one now that is intently listening and watching everything I do. As to not get too weeded into my own personal journey with food, I unfortunately suffer from my own ED and have been in situations where I don’t want to leave the house. Or where my entire mood for the day is so affected just by the voices in my head and the dysmorphic image I see in the mirror. I would not wish this type of thinking on my worst enemy. So, I too am challenging myself to speak more nicely to my body, to eat intuitively/un-diet, and stop the poking and prodding so that my daughter can learn unwavering self-love and love every single inch of herself no matter what!! Maybe I’ll find my way back to loving my own at the same time.
